NOTE: This podcast was transcribed by an AI tool. Please forgive any typos or errors. 40 lessons === [00:00:00] Today's episode of floductivity is all about the lessons I've learned. So in honor, of my 40th birthday, which this episode will be airing on my birthday. I decided to do this 40 lessons and i broke it up in 40 different videos for social media but here is this episode with 40 lessons i hope you enjoy because let me tell you these things have really impacted my life it's a powerful episode and i can't wait to dive in i'll see you on the other side. [00:00:30] Cara: Welcome to floductivity, a place to inspire and empower beings to embrace self-love and self-development for an achievable balance of productivity. I share different ways to come back to your intuition through spirituality, self care, human design, cycle planning, wellness, and everything in between. [00:00:49] Cara: Thank you so much for joining me this week. If this is your first time. Welcome. And if you've been here with me before. Thank you so much for coming back. I'm so excited to join you in this journey. As we learn [00:01:00] together. [00:01:02] There isn't one thing that's going to heal. You. One course won't solve all your problems. One coach won't be your guide from birth to death. And if you don't invest in yourself, there'll be no growth. And understanding as we tap into our intuition, our inner connectedness, knowing that as we change and as we grow, letting the things that are to support us, come to us and support us in our journey. So have that connection with yourself be open to what might come through to help you through in that season or that phase of your life [00:01:35] Life cycles. Seasons. Menstrual phases, moon phases. They all have one thing in common and that is the cyclical nature. And if we can appreciate the interconnectedness of all things and to see beauty and change and growth. And use it to our advantage. We will co-create with the universe. [00:01:55] The seasons and the menstrual cycle spring brings new growth. That's the [00:02:00] Follicular Summer or ovulation brings warmth and abundance fall. Or the luteal brings harvest and change. And winter. Or menstruation brings rest and reflection. Each season has its own beauty and purpose. And if we understand that we are not meant to do all the things all the time. [00:02:19] That co-creation with the universe will come shining through. [00:02:23] If you aren't feeling supported in your life from external sources. How can you be there for yourself? What can you do to parent yourself through that situation? How can you celebrate your accomplishments and be recognized if you're not feeling that externally? [00:02:38] Give yourself some time to reflect journal, walk in nature, meditate. On how you can be the person you need in your life right now. [00:02:47] Understanding your operations manual allows you to co-create with the universe and it is the ultimate version of self care. What is your operations manual? That's your human [00:03:00] design. And if you're someone that experiences a cycle, that's your menstrual cycle. Or you can use the moon cycle to help navigate and create these standard operating procedures in a way that feels good and allows you to flow with life with ease and purpose [00:03:16] Using a coach can change your life. A coach's meant to reflect back what you truly want in your life. They are not meant to tell you what to do. They are not meant to solve all your problems. They're meant to guide you in the best possible way for your growth specifically for you. I am someone that uses human design, astrology and cycle vitality to help someone co-create with the universe in a way that is a meant in their operations manual to empower them and to connect with their soul desires. I look for a coach that will support you in exactly what you're trying to accomplish in this lifetime and if you want to work with me you can head to my Lincoln bio for more information Do you have a place where all your desires live? Because [00:04:00] if you don't, it's time, it's a sign for you to do that. Having a vision board to help you. Be able to bring you closer to your desires is something that I feel like everybody should have in their life. However, it speaks to you. I used to do one with a magnetic board and I've switched mine digitally to help support me, to be able to continually check in on it at least once a month. It's a way that you plant the seeds that you want in your life. How you can take action towards those things and then continually revise it to make sure it's aligned with your desires and what you want to accomplish in this lifetime. [00:04:35] Since starting my vision board three years ago, I have been closer to my desires and what I want to accomplish in life. Visually. I look at it. And then from there i take action on those things that are important to me I have a template you can head to, you know where to get yours today. And if you're interested in doing a community vision board workshop, let me know in the comments. [00:04:58] If you are looking to support [00:05:00] yourself as best as you can in this lifetime, creating self toolkits is an awesome way to support yourself. There are so many different ways you can use self toolkits. There's ways that you can do it for each phase of your menstrual cycle. Each phase of the moon cycle, each season of the year. [00:05:18] Anything that you can kind of take a step back and say, what I get overwhelmed here are things that can do to help regulate my nervous system. So creating a toolkit can mean something different for every person. It's a place where you keep your meditations, or it's a place that you have a resource of books, but it's customizing it to having a place where you can refer to. And not have to think about all the things that will help you through that point in your life so start creating your toolkits and whatever best supports you right now [00:05:50] The last tip I gave was talking about creating toolkits to help support you in your life. So this tip is about creating a toolkit to help [00:06:00] regulate your nervous system. When we are out of regulation, we cannot do those daily tasks. We can't do those things that really will help us step into our power. So focusing on regulating your nervous system is a great toolkit to start with. [00:06:15] So some things are breath work. EFT tapping meditation, moving your body. Getting enough sleep. Walking in nature. So think about what can help your body. Regulate its emotions that could be journaling and start your toolkit today so that when you get over stimulated Out of balance you have this toolkit to refer back to and you don't have to think about it [00:06:39] A misconception on the healing journey is that you will become healed. becoming healed. Isn't a thing. You will always have things that you need to heal in your life. And becoming healed. Does not mean bad things won't happen to you or that you won't be triggered. It means [00:06:56] that you give yourself space for the healing. And how [00:07:00] you react to it. What is your reaction to being triggered? How long does it take you to bounce back from that emotional deregulation? Being honest with yourself and creating toolkits to help you through these times of when hard things happen or that you're triggered is really important in your healing journey [00:07:18] The last video that I did was talking about how the healing journey is an ongoing thing and that there are situations that will come about and it's about how we react to them. And so I want to bring light to when there's a reoccurring situation or argument that keeps happening. This is a time for you to reflect back and see how you can handle it differently. [00:07:43] How can you learn from this situation so that when you go forward in it, you're not having the same reactions to them because you will still get triggered. I honor you in that difficulty and I want you to become the best version of yourself. [00:08:00] And so learning from those. Reoccurring situation or patterns is going to propel you in your healing journey [00:08:06] Becoming a parent is a beautiful thing. And sometimes it brings up these unhealed parts of ourself from childhood, and you don't even have to have children to have this experience. And so when these things come through, And they're triggering. Maybe it's something that you didn't receive as a child. And so I ask how can you parent yourself? [00:08:28] And heal that inner child and give them the thing that you needed as a child. Because when we can see our children or the children around us as teachers and to what we need to heal, it's a beautiful growth practice and honor that. And. Take your inner child on a date today or plan one and connect with that because it's beautiful [00:08:51] Making yourself I priority on a daily basis will bring out the best version of yourself for those around you. Your [00:09:00] husband, your partner, your spouse, your kids, your family. And so what is it that you need to do? For yourself, is it meditation? Is it journaling? Is it walking in nature? A bath? But it has to be something that doesn't numb you like TV, social media, or substances. [00:09:18] So think about how you can take at least five minutes daily to nourish yourself because everyone around you will see. How it brings out the best version of yourself. [00:09:28] When someone has a judgment of you. It is a reflection of their own insecurities. This lesson is hard and it is. A growth opportunity for you to not let other people's opinions affect you, because guess what? It's none of your business, what they think of you because it's their own perception. And so I encourage you to build up your perception of yourself and. [00:09:55] Continually work on that perception so that when other people [00:10:00] have this judgment, it doesn't affect you. [00:10:02] When you were on the healing and growth journey, the people who have the hardest time with it are the ones closest to you. They have a certain perception of who you used to be, and it is hard for them to accept this newer, um, healed version of yourself. And it can trigger them because they don't know how or to start healing. [00:10:23] And there's a chance that it will inspire them into their own growth as they see you heal and grow into the person that. you become in this healed version of yourself [00:10:33] I believe that if you are open, And your ego is out of the way. What you need. For support and that time of your life will come to you. It could be a book. It could be a podcast. It could be a course. It could be a friend. It could be a coach. Or the answers will come to you. If you give space like in meditation or walking in nature. [00:10:55] But the key is to not control, but allow what will help you [00:11:00] without judgment or expectations. [00:11:02] [00:12:00] [00:12:42] I've had this idea of having to have a college degree to make something of myself. And so when I had this opportunity to leave my career of a hairstylist, which I didn't have a college degree, and I find that I was pretty successful in it. But I started this business and I was [00:13:00] still having this chatter about no one would believe me without having a college degree. [00:13:05] And so had the opportunity to talk to two very influential people in the online marketing world and they're experts in the field. They've made millions of dollars. And they told me to prove them wrong. That's when I decided that it's not any of my business. If someone has that limiting belief and now I'm proving them wrong without proving my worth. And I encourage you to do the same thing. [00:13:27] When was the last time that you were being and not doing. I encourage you to take some time to be just be with yourself. Be with nature. Don't go on your phone. Don't scroll because we are human beings, not human doings. And so many people are missing out the magic. And what a fulfilling life is like, because they are always doing, they're always striving to the next thing. [00:13:51] And so think of this life as there's always seasons to it, there's seasons to plan and strategize. There are seasons to [00:14:00] do all the things, and then there's a time to refine the details. And then when the most magic happens is when we have the ability to kind of sit and reflect. But how can we be ourselves and not be doing things? And so I encourage you to take some time and be. [00:14:19] \ [00:14:19] Don't assume the next few lessons that I'm going to be talking about are from the book, the four agreements. If you haven't read it, please go read it. Ultimately, this one is about not assuming. And understanding we all have different perceptions. We all have different desires. And when we assume we are putting an expectation that we will most likely be dissatisfied with and it's. [00:14:43] Not communicating. It's assuming that you already know the answer or assuming someone understands your perception. And so I encourage you when you are putting assumptions out there and how that can make your life more difficult. too. Bring that communication [00:15:00] forth And to let go of the assumptions. [00:15:03] Don't take things personally. This is another one of the agreements from the four agreements. I highly suggest reading it. [00:15:09] But don't take things personally. If someone comes at you with judgment or anything else, that is something they need to process, not you. And so how can you not take things personally? And it's hard when their social media and all these things and how people feel the need to say things that aren't nice. And look it at. [00:15:32] At it as a perspective of when someone comes at you with judgment or, just not so nice things, ultimately they probably need compassion the most Don't take things personally. It's a hard one to learn. it's a daily practice for me. [00:15:46] Do your best. Another agreement from the four agreements. And it's just asking you that when you put your effort towards something, do your best, it doesn't mean you need to be perfect. It doesn't mean you need to have it all figured out, [00:16:00] especially when you're trying something new. And so when you have decided to step foot and try something, the best thing that you can do. [00:16:06] Is do your best. [00:16:07] Be impeccable with your word. Another one of the four agreements. Please read it. If you haven't. But understand that words. Can make an impact. And so be wary of the things that you say to people, especially if it's not coming from a place of love. again, it's one of those things that's easier said than done, and it takes practice, but just understand. [00:16:30] Your words mean something and try to come at it with love. [00:16:34] Over committing is the worst thing a manifesting generator can do. If we are taking our energy and using it into something that's not lighting us up. That is the quickest way to burn out. So as a manifesting generator, make sure that you are spending time pouring your energy into the things that light you up. And that is how we are productive. That is how we can achieve so much as a [00:17:00] manifesting generator. We are powerful as long as we know how to utilize our energy and make sure that our. [00:17:06] Energy and our energetic circuitry is all lit up. And to be as powerful as we can be. [00:17:12] You want to know the quickest way to stop overthinking your decisions, look up your human design and see what your inner authority is. . It is the best way you can make decisions in your life. And once you get to know that inner authority and how you should make decisions, your life will change. [00:17:30] You are not meant to make decisions from your mind. No one is we can process the things that we're trying to decide. On, but ultimately we are built with a unique way of how we should make decisions. So look up your human design. If you want free resources, you know where to go and. I'm telling you it will change your [00:17:49] When something triggers a response out of us, that is something that you need to look within and heal. It has nothing to do with the outside [00:18:00] circumstances. It's like holding up a mirror. To something that's holding you back in your life. And it really comes true. If this trigger experience keeps happening. [00:18:09] ' cause, they won't go away until you heal it until you understand it until you see what you need. To heal through that process and that is when the true power of healing comes through [00:18:21] [00:18:21] If you're feeling stuck in your life, the best thing you can do for yourself is to get a coach because a coach will shine a light on the blind spots that you're not seeing. And the reason you're stuck is because sometimes we are so focused on what we think we need or what we need to move forward. And the purpose of a coach is to help shine a light of something that we're not seeing. [00:18:43] They bring out what we need to hear that's already within us. So I encourage you to find a coach that speaks to you to help you move through your blocks. Take action towards the things that you want in life. And so that you can be the best version of yourself. [00:18:57] If you're trying to problem solve, and you're [00:19:00] not coming up with any answers or you're left being frustrated or annoyed with this situation, I encourage you to let go of control. And surrender into the answer. I had a situation come up last night that I was contacting support. I had done something to my website and I was frantic. I really thought I did something that I wasn't going to be able to fix. And so I'm asking them, and I'm not getting anywhere with it. [00:19:24] And so I let go of control. I stopped trying to search for the answers. And ultimately I was just trying to get into a better head space and I was meditating in bed. And the answer came, it came right to me. It was something that I fixed within minutes. And I was spending hours trying to fix this. So sometimes when we really need an answer. [00:19:46] We just let go of control. And we asked for those answers to come through. [00:19:50] Everybody's intuition looks different and there's different ways that you can connect and heighten elevate your intuition. Some things that have really helped me [00:20:00] connect with that inner knowing. Is understanding how I operate as a person and that's using the human design and that's understanding my cycle and the energy that comes with it and what I'm more intuitive. And I can sit. [00:20:13] And have those answers come to me. The piece of human design that will elevate your intuition is using your inner authority or how you should make decisions. And that has been one of the most powerful ways that I can sit in the decisions and know that the things I'm deciding on are. Exactly meant for me when i am connected to that so if you're looking to elevate your intuition i encourage you to look into your human design and our authority and understand how your body operates will change your life [00:20:43] Taking time to connect with yourself is an important part of following your soul's path. If you're staying busy all day long, going from one thing to the next, how will that intuition come through? How will those messages from the universe come [00:21:00] through if you're not leaving space? Finding the practices that have you connect to yourself, your body get out of your mind into your body is really important. So things like meditation, walking in nature, journaling, finding the practices that speak to you and light you up, give you that time and space for you to have that connection with your intuition will lead you exactly on your soul path. [00:21:25] make sure that you spend time sometime today. Today every day, connecting with yourself, you won't regret it. [00:21:31] Are you on the journey to finding your soul's purpose? I've had so many clients just want to know exactly what they're meant to do here on earth. I have a secret for you. There isn't one thing that you're meant to do on earth. It is understanding who you are as a person. And coming back to alignment with that it's living your day and alignment with who you're supposed to be. [00:21:52] What feels good to you? And so if you're not coming. To know yourself in the process. What lights you up? What gives you [00:22:00] energy? What takes away energy? Those are the things that are important to following your soul's path. It's because you're getting to know yourself on a soul level, and that is how you connect with your purpose. [00:22:12] A powerful book called change. Your thoughts, change your life. Have this special piece of information in it. And it's the fact that you need to remind yourself daily. There is no way to happiness. Rather happiness is the way. So to connect with yourself fully, how can you bring that happiness? That joy? [00:22:31] That being present. Not planning, not thinking about the past, but being present and being happy and grateful for the things that you have around you are the way to happiness. So we're so busy trying to get to the next thing and to the next thing. It is hard for us to really. [00:22:49] Connect with the now. And happiness is in the now. [00:22:53] Manifesting is a hot topic. And I have a secret for you. If you stop trying to [00:23:00] focus your energy on manifesting money. And you start focusing on the things that you want. You will manifest those things so much quicker. You're taking out the middleman of that money. So what are the things you desire? [00:23:12] Not the money. What's that money going to do for you? Are you going to have more freedom? To be able to do the things that you want. So what in your life will give you that freedom besides that money? And so I found that trying to manifest money was actually blocking me from the things I desired. When I got clear on the things that I desired and took the money out of it, those things started to come to me. [00:23:36] So try it out and let me know what you think. [00:23:38] Number one tip on being more productive. As a woman, we are not meant to do all the things all the time. And when we can. Align our tasks with our menstrual cycle, we will become more productive because we're not trying to put our energy in all these buckets. We can focus our energy on these things and [00:24:00] kind of build this life, this solid foundation of life and understand that when we try to do all the things all the time. [00:24:07] All we're left with was wanting more time. We don't have enough time to do it all. And so when we can break down our tasks to align with where we're at in our cycle, it will change your life and the way you get things done and you will make productivity, your superpower. [00:24:22] If you're like me, I know you have big dreams. And let me tell you. You will get so much closer to your dreams coming in quicker. When you let go of the, how. When you leave the, how up to the universe and you work towards these things that you want, and you don't have to have it all worked out to how it's going to happen. [00:24:41] Work towards your goals and the opportunities, the things that are meant for you to align up with these visions and these dreams that you know, in your soul will start coming into you. When you let go of the control of the, how. [00:24:54] You want to know the secret to true success? It's having a holistic [00:25:00] balance in your life. It's not about just making money. It's not just about having that career, because think about how many people have the money, have the career. And ultimately they are left feeling flat and they don't have that connection with other people. [00:25:14] So it's making sure that those things around you are balanced mind, body, soul relationships, and making sure that you are taken care of holistically. And so how can you find that support for yourself around you? And connecting with that and making sure that you have these tools to help you be the best version of yourself holistically. [00:25:38] All around you. [00:25:39] When you witnessed someone being mean. Or there's judgment. [00:25:43] Understand that those people who are being mean and placing judgment on other people probably need compassion more than anything. Because they are suffering. [00:25:55] They don't know how to process or communicate that. And they are [00:26:00] reflecting. They are projecting. Their insecurities on other people because they don't know how to do the healing. And so I encourage you to take a step back and instead of placing judgment on them, See where maybe you can show them love and compassion and support and where they need to heal. [00:26:17] What are the most powerful things that you can do? Is build up the practice of becoming immune. To the opinions of other people and their actions. When you do that, you won't be a victim to this place of taking things personally. And you kind of look at it as it's a reflection of their own insecurities. [00:26:41] It's easier said than done, but when you find yourself. Having someone come at you with a judgment or opinion. Look at, at, at it as not taking that personally. Beginning that love for yourself. Making sure that love for yourself is above all. And that will help you. Uh, become immune to the opinions and [00:27:00] judgment of others. [00:27:00] I've saved the best lesson for last. [00:27:04] When we understand. That we all operate differently. We all have different perceptions. It can bring more compassion and understanding on how other people move through life. But the most important piece is accepting who you are as a person, instead of trying to live in the expectations of other people in my eyes. That's true. Success is When you know who you are as a person, how you operate, how you do things and you stand in that, and you're secure in that. That is true success. [00:27:35] Thank you so much for joining me on today's episode, if this was your first time. Welcome. And if you've joined me for previous episodes, thank you so much for coming back before you go. Could you share my show with a friend and subscribe? Those few seconds may get big impact on my show and I'd be grateful for the support. [00:27:52] I hope you enjoyed today's episode. I really had to dig deep and pull out some inner wisdom that I honestly wasn't sure [00:28:00] if it was going to show up for this episode. So I appreciate you being here. If you want to learn more access any of the resources or links mentioned in today's episode you can check the show notes caradempsey.com/58 thanks for being here and we'll chat soon